Monologue.

X: I have deceived myself for you a thousand times. Lost myself in you a thousand times. In search of you I have found myself anew a thousand times. Yet I stand hear today, feeling as empty as ever.
You have thrown me in heaven and hell a thousand times. Many a times you took the life away from my life. Many a times I felt the life flowing out of me. Ecstasy, Joy, Misery and Pain. I have experienced it all. Yet nothing seems to stay.

You ask for my surrender. Well I have already surrendered to my fate. I want you but time and again you throw me back to myself. I want to unveil you but you being the greatest of schemers made me the veil and hid behind it.

I pray ardently but you communicate with me only through the language of silence. Why should I abide by your rules then? Why should I honor you? You gave me enough courage to challenge your authority but not enough to deny you. What kind of justice is this? Love me, despise me, kill me, adore me but just let me know it Lord. Will you ever answer oh dear Lord?


(Just the eerie silence)

Young Goethe

Goethe: A poet- I used to believe in that.
His Friend: But?
Goethe: Nobody else did.


Young Goethe in Love

Life is Beautiful

The only satisfactory answer for all the absurdity and suffering in the world is love.

Friendship.

Seeking Happiness.

Quite often I wonder what constitutes true happiness. The nature of happiness is inextricably connected to nature of time and reality. Without exaggeration we as human beings capture only a tiny part of our vast and gigantic universe. Our own lives seem almost insignificant in front of ever flowing river of time. Time eats up everything. Whatever has been, is not. Whatever is, will not be. Everything is brief and fleeting. In this state of flux, the present only belongs to us for the briefest moment and then forever to the past.

How can one be happy in such a fleeting universe? I have observed that a lot of us believe that true happiness resides in distant future. All our hopes, ambitions and dreams have something to do with the future. This makes us use the 'present moment' only as a means to an end, the end being future happiness. It never occurs to us that the future happiness may never arrive. Death may end our lives any moment. We are left with nothing but the regret. The ultimate realization comes a bit too late. Eventually we realize that the 'present' was all we had and we lost it for something that was never ours (the possibility of future happiness). Some might suggest that true happiness will only come if one learns to live in the present moment. This solution comes at a prize. We have to let go of our dreams and ambitions. I propose a a new solution here. True happiness is never about being happy. It has nothing to do with the present or future. True happiness lies in 'seeking happiness'.

So, Always look on the bright side of life :D :D

Ultimate Skeptic.

He doubted everything including his own happiness.

New Opium of the masses.

“A true opium of the people is a belief in nothingness after death - the huge solace of thinking that for our betrayals, greed, cowardice, murders we are not going to be judged.”- C. Milosz